Most people try to surround themselves with others who improve their emotional well-being. This is done not only through their support, but also by sharing positive energy when they spend time together. Yet there are also toxic people out there. Far from making you feel good, these people can steal your energy with their negative thoughts and problems. There is nothing wrong with helping others when they are in need. However, it is also important to know if they really want help or if they are just trying to manipulate you. Know the signs of victim mentality.
Thanks to your warm heart, some people begin to make themselves victims. They do this to generate guilt or avoid taking responsibility.
This behavior causes them to blame other people for things that go wrong. Then they hardly solve any of the problems of their own lives, since they can always find a sympathetic ear.
Because of this, it is important to know how these people behave and what strategies they use to make you feel that you always have to go in and help.
Learn to recognize the following eight signs of victim mentality.
8 signs of victim mentality
1. They believe that the world is against them
Even if some are not aware of it, those who play the role of the victim often have a mentality that makes them turn reality into something dark and pessimistic.
They are still on the defensive and think everyone else is against them.
When you talk to them, they will often complain that no one loves them or that no one else is able to understand what they are going through.
2. They do not take responsibility
Inability to take personal responsibility is one of the primary patterns of behavior for those who play the role of the victim. In their minds, they are so convinced that others will help them. They think this is what is causing them.
This makes it easy for them to ignore the role they themselves play in their own problems. Thus , they point to other people no matter what the consequences are. In fact, they can become so manipulative that when they gain your trust, they can make you feel guilty because you could not help them.
3. They exaggerate their problems
As the saying goes, “they make a storm in a glass of water.”
They feel fragile, exaggerating their problems or situations they do not like.
Since they always want compassion, they may cry or get angry, so that the “alleged” culprit feels guilty and apologizes.
4. They feel that everything is going the wrong way for them
Talking to these people can really put you off. This is not because they are so negative, but also because their stories are always tragedies. They will continually tell you how bad things are, about their family problems, or how they think other people are towards them. Consequently, they never see the opportunities that adversity can provide. Their minds are completely closed to the idea that everything can be improved if they work for it.
5. They never say sorry
When a person playing the victim apologizes, it is generally not sincerely meant. In fact , they rarely admit their mistakes and apologize to those affected by them.
Their mechanism of manipulation is so effective that they can always find a way to justify their behavior, and be the “good person” in the end.
6. They feel sorry for themselves
People who are used to being a victim often have strong self-critical criticisms, and are good at highlighting their mistakes. Their habit of feeling sorry for themselves makes them seem helpless or fragile to other people.
If they fail to generate sympathy or empathy in others, they use it to be able to be more miserable and become even more entrenched in their role as the victim.
7. They believe that life is full of mistakes
Even when something good happens to them, a victim will find fault with continuing their negative and toxic thinking. Despite the opportunities that may arise, life is always full of shortcomings. They can not and will not find happiness in doing anything.
If they have anything, they will complain. On the other hand, if they have nothing, they will also complain. If they are missing something, or if someone has more than them, they complain. This locks them into a cycle that prevents them from overcoming the feeling that they are missing something.
8. They are evil people
To continue to suffer, victims will remember events from the past when someone or something caused them some kind of personal injury.
They are not able to leave the things that caused them pain. Thus, they almost always use the opportunity to bring them to light.
Do you know anyone with these signs of victim mentality? Be careful. Even if you are very close and want to help a person with victim mentality, it is important to remember that many of their actions are driven by habits that are difficult to break. Do not let them steal your energy and try to steer clear of their problems to avoid being manipulated.