Falling in love with people who do not love themselves can be very difficult.
The main reason is that when you love someone, you will constantly remind them how wonderful they are. For someone who does not love himself, it is difficult to accept such compliments.
People who do not love themselves often reject compliments without realizing how painful it can be for others. This is why we all look for a partner who values himself.
However, this is not the only reason why it is difficult to love someone who does not love themselves. Here are some other reasons:
Communication is difficult
Communication can turn into a duty if you are in a relationship with someone who does not know how to love themselves.
These people tend to misinterpret things and to always assume the worst.
Situations like this are very frustrating for many people. Most people who do not love themselves pass on their own problems to their partner.
For example, say you complete your partner’s sentence. Yes then, it happens all the time, but they may take it as if you are condescending or lying.
It is difficult to take care of someone who does not take care of themselves
It can be frustrating to love someone who does not love or take care of themselves. This causes spontaneous comments such as “you look good today” to be criticized because of their low self-esteem.
It is common for them to start criticizing you for every little thing you try to tell them because of their insecurities.
As you can imagine, it is tiring to spend time and energy trying to make your loved one smile, when you never succeed.
After all, no matter how hard you try, they are unlikely to trust you or take your words for granted.
People who do not love themselves often become too addicted
It is normal for your partner to trust you when it comes to cheering them up and making them feel better when they feel sad or negative. That’s probably what you would expect from them too.
It ceases to be healthy when they depend on you to make them happy. Extreme addiction can turn into something suffocating.
They will probably start to think that you will leave them. Over time, you will begin to think that it is not such a bad idea, and they will be left without their only source of happiness.
Someone who does not love himself tends to refuse help
When you love someone, you will help them feel good. But you have to remember that they have rejected themselves since before you met them. This means that they are not willing to accept help from anyone.
This complicates things. Because even if you keep hoping that one day they will accept your help, the truth is that this will probably never happen.
Try to remember that you can not change people. You are not able to change the essence of a person to make them who you want them to be.
The trust between you is destroyed
When a person does not love themselves for who they are, they cannot understand why others would love them. Usually, they are constantly worried that their partner will “realize” who they really are and end the relationship.
Things like this make it very difficult to build a bond of trust with your partner.
A person who is permanently anxious or worried that you will leave often seems negative. The irony is that this fear actually ends up pushing you away.
Things to know if you love someone who does not love themselves
If you are able to be with someone who does not love himself, it means that you are a caring and protective person.
But believing that a conversation will be enough to fix everything will only make you disappointed.
If you are actually willing to help your partner stop rejecting you, remember that they must first and foremost be the ones who really want to change and accept the help you offer.
You should pay attention to how you feel. If you are physically or emotionally burnt out because of the relationship, you may want to get out of it
In that case, you should ask yourself these questions:
- Do I really think my partner can change?
- Are they aware that I’m not happy?
- Are they actually interested in changing?
Once you have your answers, you will be able to see if it is worth continuing or not.
After all , you should not sacrifice your own happiness for someone who will not stop being unhappy.
Remember that the only one who is responsible for your happiness is you, just as your partner is also responsible for his own happiness.